I saw a headline on a women's magazine in the grocery store that got me thinking. It read, “How To Get Everything You've Ever Wanted: a fabulous house, a flat stomach, longer foreplay, the perfect lipstick, and a better price on everything.”
Hhhmm.
How shallow are we now?
Not that I don't want those things – actually some I have, and they're not all they are cracked up to be. (I'll let you draw your own conclusions about which ones.)
So are those things the key to happiness? If you have everything you want, will you be happy? What happens if you aren't sure what you want? What if what you want changes?
I thought I wanted pet cats. I thought I wanted four children until I had three. I used to think I wanted to be adored; however, when I got that, it was totally creepy. For a while I was praying for strength for me and my family. When things got worse, I decided I didn't want that any more either. I was thrilled to get this house, but now it is an endless source of debt and work.
I want to have a loving relationship with my children – even my thirteen year old. I actually do have that, it's just not always obvious. I want world peace. I want someone else to do the laundry. I want a good night's sleep. I want to be a writer. I want to be both relaxed and alert.
Is it just the human condition to be unsatisfied? If you were truly content and had everything you wanted, would you be happy? Would you be bored? Do we really want everything we've ever wanted?
Big Changes
7 years ago
4 comments:
I have decided for me personally, that I want to be happy with the woman who I look at in the mirror each morning. That woman is far from perfect, she doesn't have everything she has always wanted, sometimes doesn't even have everything she needs. But she does have wonderful children, fabulous friends ;-), and truly likes the person she sees. I think that I am now happy not with what material things that I have(or don't), but with myself, my children, and my circle of friends. Someone once told me that her life really began after she hit 40, and I am finally understanding what she was telling me. If you are happy with the person you are, everything else is just "gravy."
Hear, Hear! Laura.
I think most of the people pushing for "perfect" in and out of the media are younger people, especially women. They want more because they feel it neccessary to make their life "perfect". We (meaning we sage ladies) all know to a large degree "perfect" isn't neccessary or attainable. And most likely we would be bored and ready to move on to other things if we ever did manage to attain our ideal state.
I found a quote while touring the Smithsonian last week that seems to fit here. It was a quote from a woman left paralized by polio.
"Polios have an advantage when it comes to aging. We do not confuse the quality of our life with the quality of our tennis game...Meaningful life may be hampered, but not defined by pain or disability."
I hope my life is meaningful.
When I read your post I'm reminded of the book, The Quiltmaker's Gift. It's a fable about a king who wants everything and still isn't happy. He sees a quilt made by the wise old quiltmaker and he wants one. She declines his request, even though he's king. She has him give away all his gifts and prized he has and she'll make a quilt for him. He protests, then finally aquiesses and learns he's much happier and rich in spirit without his worldly posessions.
I stuggle with being happy with myself, as I've written in my own blog. I'm trying to be OK with myself and not get hung up on material things, It's hard when society is pushing the other way, like the magazine that started this whole posting in the first place.
Check out the book, by the way: The Quiltmaker's Gift Beautiful artwork, wonderful story.
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